DAD JOKES

[CRF857 421]

[CRF857 421]

[SylvanLakeWH 31,911]

[953 nut 67,928]

 

 

Edited 2 hours ago by 953 nut

[SylvanLakeWH 31,911]

My wife rearranged the spice rack labels... I haven't told her yet but the thyme is cumin... 

[c-series don 12,242]

Keep em coming! I love this kind of stuff! 

[CasaytheMann 231]

If Apple made a car, would it have Windows?

[CasaytheMann 231]

“If you see a robbery at an Apple Store does that make you an iWitness?!”

[CasaytheMann 231]

“What’s black and bad for your teeth? A bowling ball.”

[CasaytheMann 231]

What do you get when you put ducks in a cement mixer?

Quacks in the concrete!

[Achto 32,182]

What do you call a well balance Horse?

Stable

 

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?

Because the "P" is silent.

 

What id the difference between a poorly dressed man on a tricycle and a well dressed man on a bicycle?

Attire

 

Two fish are in a tank. One turns to the other and says "Any idea how to drive this thing?"

 

What did the drummer name her twin daughters?

Anna 1,Anna 2

 

Why do cows have hooves instead of feet?

They lactose.

 

I stayed up all night and tried to figure out where the sun was.

Then it dawned on me.

 

Why do chicken coops only have two doors?

If they had four, they would be chicken sedans!

 

I am on a 30-day diet.

So far, I’ve lost 15 days.

[CRF857 421]

[953 nut 67,928]

What does a man have that;

 

is somewhat ridged,

 

somewhat flexible,

 

has the following letters in its spelling,

 

N   S   P   E   I

 

?    ?    ?    ?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

SPINE                           What did you          think I was spelling?

 

[Achto 32,182]

It's a 5 minute walk from my house to the bar, but a 45 minute walk from the bar to my house.

The difference is staggering.

 

Edited 44 minutes ago by Achto